On Friday, December 23rd I decided that I was going to hang my elf legs from my car. (It was getting down to it’s now or never.) As I opened the back of my car up, hooked the legs over the latch, and closed the door, I looked down and noticed the legs would dangle significantly behind my car. That particular morning it was early, (just after 7 AM) and still a little bit dark. I pondered how safe it was to distract all the people who were burnt out and tired that day with my “Funny Elf Legs” because they had to go to work when all they wanted to do was stay home and wrap presents, bake, or finish last minute shopping because Christmas was JUST 2 days away.
As well, in the last couple of weeks I’ve seen craziness on the roads. I’ve watched multiple cars fly along snow-covered city streets, failing to signal as they squeezed in between cars where it technically was not enough room for their vehicle but was only meant to be the “space cushion” between cars.
Ahhhh….Tis the Season for Christmas Craziness.
I also had this vivid thought that my elf legs would somehow cause my trunk to open and not only would the elf legs be thrust on the windshield of the car that followed me, but all the contents that I carry around in the back of my trunk from my little blue plastic bin to my Hershey cover would be thrown at the driver (or drivers) that followed me to work that morning along the Parkway. I could see the headlines now:
WOMAN’S ELF LEGS CAUSES MULTI-VEHICLE COLLISION ON PARKWAY:
DRIVER SAYS SHE THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUNNY
And that’s the problem with having an imagination. You can always think of the worst possible situation.
So, I couldn’t do it. Not that morning. Instead, I hung my elf legs to the back of my windshield wiper. And I have to tell you, I was still worried. But, I had to do something as I had the legs and I said I would do it. (I had already posted the picture on my blog!)
As I drove into work that morning with my legs dangling behind me, I looked around at the other cars from my rear-view mirror and I didn’t see one person that chuckled. Did no one see them? Did they think I was the weirdo with the elf legs? Did they not think they were awesome?
That’s the problem with putting yourself out there. You might be the only person who thinks you’re funny.
That night after work I had to the grocery store. It’s literally around the corner from where I live, so this time I hitched the legs up as per the instructions. It’s a short drive with no 100 KM highway driving (no fear of losing my legs), no 60 KM weaving Parkway, and the weather conditions were alright.
This time the closest I came to someone noticing was when I returned from the grocery store. I saw a woman with two boys between the ages of 8-10 years old gawking at my back bumper. They weren’t laughing; it was more a look of confusion. But as I watched them, I chuckled.
Ultimately, you know what? My elf legs made me laugh. I liked them even though I wasn’t as brave as I should have been at tucking them under my closed trunk and driving at high speeds with them. But hey – I always fasten my seat belt, I’ve never smoked a day in my life, and I wore a helmet as I teetered on my skateboard at -50 KM/HR.
But without this blog, I would never have even tried the elf legs.